First, I don't know even why I'm writing this shit in English but I guess it's because using that language reminds me of a dream that sometimes it seems so damn high for my little wings.
Actually, everythings seems bigger than me and I know that this monster who does not have a name is always eating me alive and making me small but I just don't know how to stop it. I just don't know how to make it better, how to kick he out of my life. I just don't know nothing and this is frightening cause I see people making theirs paths, shining and getting things that they want and then I'm here in the middle of nothing, loosing my life on this pc.
It's hard to get up on these days, it's hard to think about be as a good person, as a special one, as a talented one when you have so many in the world. I sometimes think that I'm useless, that I'm just a gray painting on the wall, and then I'm scared of the thoughts that everyone has someone that is treasured but I don't have anyone like that. I want to embrace the world but sometimes... I just...
Anyway, I guess I'm only afraid. I don't like to be there but... Geeez, is hard not to be. It's hard to deal with myself everyday, to deal with my ghosts, to sit with them and make them just ghosts not real life.
I'm just a little girl trying to be a woman, everyday, trying to get things. I'm just me.
Just afraid to live.
Actually, everythings seems bigger than me and I know that this monster who does not have a name is always eating me alive and making me small but I just don't know how to stop it. I just don't know how to make it better, how to kick he out of my life. I just don't know nothing and this is frightening cause I see people making theirs paths, shining and getting things that they want and then I'm here in the middle of nothing, loosing my life on this pc.
It's hard to get up on these days, it's hard to think about be as a good person, as a special one, as a talented one when you have so many in the world. I sometimes think that I'm useless, that I'm just a gray painting on the wall, and then I'm scared of the thoughts that everyone has someone that is treasured but I don't have anyone like that. I want to embrace the world but sometimes... I just...
Anyway, I guess I'm only afraid. I don't like to be there but... Geeez, is hard not to be. It's hard to deal with myself everyday, to deal with my ghosts, to sit with them and make them just ghosts not real life.
I'm just a little girl trying to be a woman, everyday, trying to get things. I'm just me.
Just afraid to live.
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